Why Is It So Hard To Ask For Help?
Mike and Chris discuss the difficulty of asking for help and the cultural factors that contribute to this reluctance. They explore the fear of appearing weak or inadequate, the desire for self-sufficiency, and the societal emphasis on individualism. They also highlight the importance of community and the value of asking for help, both in receiving assistance and allowing others to exercise their gifts.
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Why is it so hard to ask for help? Mike Mobley and Chris Howard say it often comes down to pride and a culture that prizes self-sufficiency, so asking feels like admitting defeat. They point out that God made us interdependent, like members of one body with different gifts, and that when we refuse to ask, we keep others from serving us with the gifts God gave them. Starting with their shared struggle to ask a generous friend for car help, they talk about the “bootstraps” messages we grow up with, how their own childhoods made them fiercely independent, the difference between humble asking and taking advantage, and why asking for help is an act of love. Below: the key takeaways, the Scripture discussed, and the full episode transcript.
Feeling Helpless Next to the Expert
Neither host is a car guy. Mike’s dad was a mechanic who turned every breakdown into a lesson, and Chris can manage batteries and fuses but not much more. They share a friend who has made helping people with their cars part of how he serves the Lord, and he has given them an “unlimited ticket.” It is still hard to ask. Standing off to the side while someone skilled diagnoses the problem makes you feel dumb and helpless. Mike admits that sometimes he’d rather let the car die than ask.
Why We Don’t Ask: Pride and the Bootstraps Story
Our culture tells us to pull ourselves up by our bootstraps. The stories we celebrate, from Founding Fathers to star athletes, are about the lone hero who did it with no help. From a child’s first steps (“you don’t need our help”) to keeping our eyes on our own paper in school, we are conditioned for independence and then told to ask for help when we need it. Mike says we come to believe our value is found in being self-sustaining, so asking feels like an admission of defeat as a person. It is a facade.
How Our Stories Shape Us
Chris grew up without a dad and wanted to prove he could do everything on his own, so he bristled at asking for help and missed advice that might have kept him from circling. Mike’s parents divorced, and he learned he had to figure things out himself, then got praised for his drive. Both now see that if asking for help is failure, then any mistake means you’ve failed at life, and no one can live that way. So they hold a mock vote, Robert’s Rules and all, to throw out the idea that it is wrong to ask for help.
Asking Lets Others Use Their Gifts
A year before graduating from college, Chris reached out to two friends’ dads for business advice and received thoughtful answers he still treasures. Today he would relish the chance to do the same for someone else. Mike says that when we don’t ask, we rob each other of the chance to serve. Not everybody is the arm, the head or the leg; we are interdependent, and God may have designed it that way so we build community by serving each other. When no one asks, the whole system breaks down.
Humble Asking vs. Taking Advantage
The more personal the need, such as health or marriage, the harder it is to ask, because it feels vulnerable. But when we are honest, we discover others struggle with the same things. Chris notes the opposite problem too: the person who expects others to do everything for him without any effort. That is taking advantage, and it can make the rest of us afraid of being seen as needy. Mike’s challenge is to check our motives and remember that if someone asked us for help, we would gladly give it.
Reach Out to Someone This Week
Being served well is contagious, like a pay-it-forward line at a coffee shop. Chris encourages listeners who feel lonely or isolated to reach out to the person who comes to mind, even just to talk. Mike reminds us that asking for help doesn’t make you less valuable; it values the other person too. We love because God first loved us and reached out to us first, and we can’t do that, or many other things, on our own.
Scriptures From This Episode
1 John 4:19 (“We love because he first loved us”)
1 Corinthians 12:21 (“The eye cannot say to the hand, I have no need of you, nor again the head to the feet, I have no need of you”)
Hebrews 10:24 (“And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works”)
Go deeper: Scripture on Humility · Scripture on Help · Humility Before God · No Mask Required · Why Community Is More Important Than You Think · Real Community Shows When There’s Trouble · Lessons Learned as a Husband: Effective Communication
Full Transcript, Not Quite There, Episode 19: Why Is It So Hard To Ask For Help?
Chris: If we’re not asking, then in some ways we’re keeping people from actually exercising their gifts in our life, which maybe God designed the whole time.
Mike: We realize every episode that starts with Chris is a singing Chris.
Chris: Well, today, why not at least start off talking a little bit about the… it’s been unseasonably hot. Or has it been seasonably hot?
Mike: I feel like a cool 108 degrees is, you know, balmy weather. Not a cloud in the sky, just a nice warm breeze.
Chris: Put on a light coat.
Mike: Yeah, we’re in Texas. So 108 is a legitimate degree that’s been on the weather. And then the “feels like” temperature, whatever you call it, says it feels like it’s 115. I don’t know how that works.
Chris: That is like salt in the wound. You have the wound of 108, and then here comes the salt.
Mike: Isn’t the heat index like lemon juice? Some guy’s like, “Hey, it’s 108, which you’re already depressed about, but it feels like 115. So enjoy your workday today.”
Chris: Make sure you don’t get out there and do anything around the house. But then again, the house doesn’t really cooperate sometimes with this hot weather. Are you seeing some projects that need attention?
Mike: I mean, yes. Houses, cars. I don’t know if everyone can relate to 108-degree temperatures. Maybe those of you who have strong winters.
Chris: I do have a friend up in Buffalo listening right now.
Mike: Well, thank you, Buffalo. These are not issues that he’s experiencing. Timmy from Buffalo does not have this. I’m assuming his name is Timmy. That’s just the most natural.
Chris: We’ll call him Timmy, just for identity purposes.
Mike: For the sake of censoring confidential information.
Chris: You know who you are, Timmy.
Mike: Yeah, I’ve had my AC kind of want to go out, get a little weaker than normal. I’ve had some patches of grass that are dying quickly because I’m not watering them every two seconds. It’s that tension of not wanting to pay a $500 water bill, but you also don’t want to let your grass die. And then my car is struggling on starting and getting its power to get moving, which I don’t blame it. The car is probably like 130. You know what I mean? It’s going to be even hotter.
Chris: Yeah, I don’t feel confident when it comes to the car and fixing and maintaining all this.
Mike: This is where my father would not be proud of me. He was a mechanic and has that engineer-mechanic mindset. And I remember maybe being 15. I started driving when I was 15. I had a hardship license because I was working. A hardship is kind of like a license you can get a little early. And I remember every time the car would break down, he would go into dad mode, lesson mode, which I do for my own kids. He’d be like, “Well, son, let me tell you how the engine works.” And I’m hearing blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I’m like, “Man, Dad, thank you. That’s great.”
Chris: “How do we fix the manifold?”
Mike: I’m not listening. He’s like, “The flux capacitor and the rotary girder go in a three-point-one formation.”
Chris: That’s engineer speak. You’re impressing me.
Mike: It’s more like, “Mike, this is a wrench. Righty tighty, lefty loosey.” And I’d be like, “Dad, thank you. Can you fix it, please? For me.” So car issues for me have always been… I feel less of a man admitting this right now, but I can’t do a lot with cars.
Chris: Well, you and I are in the same camp. Even when I have done things on my vehicle to improve it, or make sure it has a new battery, or some things I’ve seen on YouTube, okay, I feel confident about that. If it has to do with shocks or the engine, or overhauling anything…
Mike: Such a vague term. Overhauling anything.
Chris: That’s going to have some problems there.
Mike: If anyone’s like, “Well, Chris, we’re going to have to overhaul this…”
Chris: Oh, no. I knew you were going to say that. It kind of gets out of my league really quickly there.
Mike: So what’s something that is in your league that you can fix?
Chris: I can put a new battery in.
Mike: Like in the TV remote, new batteries?
Chris: Yeah, yeah. Car battery, AAs or AAAs, in my car, changing out some fuses.
Mike: Well, I was thinking outside of the car world. You’re talking about things in general. Is there something you can fix with ease that’s hard for someone else?
Chris: Bad grammar. Yes.
Mike: Thank you. That’s why we’re partnered together. There we go.
Chris: I feel pretty confident about knowing my vocabulary, and words, and the order in which things should go.
Mike: And I think I can fix computers. Tech. I seem to speak tech, no matter what we’re talking about.
Chris: That’s what makes you a great partner.
Mike: That helps. I can do that. But the car? No. And then I hate asking someone for help, because I always feel like I’m putting someone out to help me with my car, especially if I’m asking the same person over and over over the years, because I haven’t learned how to fix it.
Chris: And I think we know who that person is, and they’re very dear to us. And they do a wonderful job helping us during those times when we’ve needed it.
Mike: So for context, because someone may not know what in the world you’re saying, we do have a shared friend who happens to help us with our cars. But he helps a lot of people with their cars. He’s one of those guys. So we talk about easy fixes, right? Grammar: if someone came to you for grammar, you’d probably help them in two seconds, then the next person, the next person, the next person.
Chris: Got a dangling participle there.
Mike: So this guy would be that for cars. He’s almost made it his life’s mission, as he serves the Lord, to just overflow with help for car-related things. It could be anything, but basically a lot of car work for a lot of people. But even with someone who says, “I want to help you as much as possible, all the time. You have an unlimited ticket with me,” it’s still hard to ask for help, right?
Chris: Especially in the summer, when it’s going to be hot.
Mike: Why is that so, Chris? Why is it so hard to ask for or receive help?
Chris: I can tell you the feeling of watching somebody work on your vehicle, where you would like to know what they know. You would like to know what they’re going to do next and the reasons why. And then watching them do that with skill while you’re standing there off to the side…
Mike: Eating some Cheetos. Crunch.
Chris: You might as well be eating Cheetos, because you’re not really helping. You might ask a few questions, but then you feel like you’re bothering them. You’re actually keeping them from doing what it is they want to serve with.
Mike: And you try to help. You’re like, “Oh, is that the rotary…?”
Chris: Manifold.
Mike: Basically, that’s where I feel like an idiot. So then I never want to even ask for help.
Chris: Right. I feel dumb. So knowing that going in, I just don’t want to feel like an idiot off to the side. Our good friend, once again, is looking at an issue and diagnosing it correctly and then knowing what to do, and it just kind of makes us feel a little bit helpless.
Mike: It makes me feel so helpless. I’ll admit, I will sometimes be like, you know what, my car can just explode. I don’t want to fix it. I’ll just let it all burn to the ground and then be like, “Oh, I guess my car died.”
Chris: “I didn’t have to ask.”
Mike: Yeah. And I know we’re not alone in this, because I could help someone, let’s say, with a computer issue, and I can feel their tension of not even wanting to ask, because they’re going to have to ask for help. And I’m like, no, I actually want to help you. And I help them, and then they feel so relieved. So then I’m like, okay, clearly this is not just a me issue, or a me-and-you issue. As people, we obviously hate asking for help. There’s got to be something in there. We want to be self-sustaining. Why do you think that’s so hard?
Chris: It’s a good question. It’s a loaded question. There are a lot of reasons.
Mike: Like a loaded baked potato.
Chris: Like a loaded baked potato.
Mike: What do you put on your loaded baked potato? Butter?
Chris: Usually, yes. Naturally. I do like a little bit of bacon.
Mike: Oh, a little bit? Come on. A lot of cheese.
Chris: Cheese is okay.
Mike: Here’s where we might become different. Do you put sour cream on it?
Chris: I have since I was very young.
Mike: Okay, you’re disgusting. Do you put chives on it?
Chris: No. Are you kidding me? What is wrong with you?
Mike: You are actually… do you seriously?
Chris: I do. That’s a loaded potato.
Mike: Having chives is like, I’m eating a baked potato with a tree over here on the side. It tastes like onions. It takes over the entire flavor of every single other flavor. You’re not having a loaded potato. You’re not having a potato. You’re not having food. You’re just eating green stuff.
Chris: You’re eating a baked potato, man. I was so excited about that. Well, once you get in the game and load that potato…
Mike: Now I’m not going to go back to why people have a hard time asking for help. We’re focused on sour cream.
Chris: Yeah, there are many reasons. I think the culture that we live in has a lot to do with it. We’re taught to pull ourselves up by the bootstraps. Have you ever seen bootstraps?
Mike: I haven’t. I’ve actually never seen anyone pull up their bootstraps either. Is the bootstrap the side of the boot?
Chris: If I had seen bootstraps, I’d know where they are. I can’t think of what those are.
Mike: As many people as say the phrase, I’ve never seen a guy put on a pair of boots and say, “I’m pulling up my bootstraps now.” I’ve never seen that. We are massively distracted. We went from baked potato to bootstraps. We’re clearly hungry, and we want to be cowboys. So it is loaded. Well, here’s the deal. Let me see if I can help you out here, because I do think there are a lot of reasons. Like you said, the West, the United States, whatever: we have a lot of pride, right? We don’t want to have to ask for it. We want to figure it out. We want to be self-sustaining, not dependent.
Chris: Right. The best stories are about the person who stood tall against it all.
Mike: And they were the hero.
Chris: They were the hero.
Mike: No dependency. They were the hero themselves.
Chris: It doesn’t really talk about, well, so-and-so got help from this person, and that person really helped them get over that. It’s about how that person persevered. They endured.
Mike: Yeah, yeah. They did it. Period. With no help.
Chris: I think we see that early on in school. They’ll pull out a Founding Father and say, okay, well, these are the great qualities about him, and a lot of it has to do with standing firm on his own, or when things were unpopular. So I think it starts early. It’s just part of our culture, part of our heritage, part of our history. And we see that play out in the culture around us today too, not just in history but in sports. When athletes are telling a story or being featured in a story, a lot of it is about that one person. Sometimes you get a story about the community, and I think we’re coming around to that a little bit more, but the most compelling stories tend to be focused on that one person.
Mike: The one person taking their talents somewhere, city to city to city. No, you’re right. Even when your kid is walking for the first time, you’re like, “You can do it. You don’t need our help.” And then, ironically, later as you’re teaching them, it’s like, “Hey, ask for help.” So you’re getting raised on “don’t ask for help,” but “make sure you ask for help when you need help.”
Chris: And you get into school, and you’re supposed to keep your eyes on your own paper. Don’t ask anybody for help during this test.
Mike: And then a teacher later is like, “You should have raised your hand and asked for help.” It’s super confusing. I guess it makes sense, now that we’re talking about it, why it’s so hard. I think there’s also something where we really feel weak and inadequate, even worthless, though I know that’s kind of a dramatic word. But I think we feel some measure of that, and it makes us feel icky or gross, and then you’re like, I’m not going to ask for help.
Chris: So you’re conditioned for independence on one hand. And on the other, it’s not forbidden, but it’s looked down upon, or at least you think it’s looked down upon.
Mike: I think you’re conditioned not to ask for help, so therefore you find value in not asking for help. And then you practice that for enough years. And again, I think the punch line is, it’s a facade. But we buy into the belief that our value is found in being self-sustaining. If that’s true, asking for help would be this massive admission of defeat as a person, as an identity. So then it kind of makes sense why I’m never going to ask for help, because if I ask for help, I’m ruined as a person.
Chris: Like many things, it’s something we have to recognize, see the problems within, and take a step toward not letting it dictate what we do. Because certainly growing up, and I think we covered this when I shared my story, not having a dad, I wanted to be as self-sufficient as possible. I wanted to prove to some unknown figure, somebody I didn’t even know, that I could do things on my own, that I didn’t need to have a dad figure around. So asking for help became something that I really bristled against. No, I don’t want to ask anybody. I want to figure this out on my own. Looking back on it now, I can see there was a lot of opportunity there that I missed, where people extended help that I did not take, or advice that I did not take, that maybe kept me cycling or circling.
Mike: Well, that makes sense to me, because for me, growing up, my parents got divorced, and then I realized I couldn’t rely on them. So I think along the way it was like, okay, I’m just going to figure this out myself. But then you’re applauded along the way for having the drive and being self-sustaining, so to speak. I think you hit on something: the first step has got to be realizing that it’s a problem if I can’t ask for help, which I don’t think everyone currently thinks. I think it’s a learned situation. So something for you and me to think about, or anyone who’s listening: go the other way for a second. If it’s a failure to ask for help, that means you can never make a mistake. You can never fail at anything. So if you do, you’ve fundamentally failed at life. It’s over. I’m pretty sure anyone who’s been here for more than 30 seconds knows that can’t be reality. That can’t be true, because I’ve messed up. I’ve made mistakes. If I’m honest with myself, of course I’ve needed help at times. So let’s just get this out of the way. Let’s take a vote. I’m going to raise my hand and take a vote. Let’s push away the thought that it’s wrong to ask for help. I think we can throw that in the trash.
Chris: I’m going to vote with you.
Mike: Okay. So, second… How do they vote in fancy voting places? It’s like, “Can I get a second on the proposal?”
Chris: Oh, using Robert’s Rules.
Mike: Yeah. Give me Timmy’s rules.
Chris: There’s the motion there.
Mike: So how does that work? The first person motions, right? So do I just say “motion”? And then, “Second.” And then it’s like, “Motion passes.”
Chris: Passes, passes. Okay, we’re there.
Mike: So officially we’ve thrown in the trash the idea that it is wrong to ask for help. Let’s start there.
Chris: We’re starting there. I remember the first time I asked for help outside of a normal situation, other than directions or talking to a guidance counselor. About the year before I graduated from college, I reached out to the dads of two friends I had. They were both pretty adept at business, and I was about to enter that world. I just wanted to ask some questions: what would their advice be to start, and start well? That was out of the ordinary for me. Number one, I felt like, they weren’t my dad, so I might be bothering them or asking them to do something outside of what they had time for. I got back not just two responses, but two very well-thought-out responses that showed they took time to answer the questions, and to share with me even some things I didn’t ask about. And I treasured those. Did I follow up and say, “Anytime I have a question, would it be okay to approach you?” No, because I got in and got out. I didn’t want to get into the habit of feeling like I had to ask or be dependent, so I didn’t necessarily learn the lesson there. But I did see the value of asking, and that’s the time I remember the most.
Mike: Okay, well, at least you took a step. What got you to the place to ask?
Chris: I think not having a clue what the next chapter in life was going to look like. I didn’t see it in my family growing up. We didn’t have anybody who was working in the corporate world. I didn’t exactly know what that was going to look like, or what you should aspire to in it. So it was all foreign to me.
Mike: So you reached almost the end of the road there, where you’re like, okay, there’s no other place to go. I’m going to have to ask someone.
Chris: I see them doing this excellently over here. It’s obviously worked out well for them. They’re going to know some things I need to ask about, because I need to know.
Mike: So we all have different skills and abilities, which means we all have different strengths and weaknesses. It’s helped me to think, okay, we’re such a diverse people, male, female, child, adult, believer, non-believer, et cetera. There are some things I can help others with that they happen to be weak in and I happen to be strong in, because that’s how God’s wired me. Likewise, that must mean there are things I’m weak in that other people are strong in. We can’t be strong in everything. That’s impossible. And praise God, we’re also not weak in everything either. So maybe it’s just getting older and realizing that on such a large scale, but it’s helping me. It’s not always easy, but it’s helping me ask for help. Because, like you said, those two guys who gave you brilliant feedback and wisdom because you asked, they got the chance to serve you by doing that. And they had that wisdom to give, which in turn helped you. And I’m guessing that as you’ve gotten older, you’ve been able to share wisdom with others, and you might even pull from that scenario.
Chris: If a near college graduate were to approach me asking for something similar, I would love that opportunity to be able to say, this is what I’ve learned. I would really relish it. So I can see now, from what they did for me, more about what their vantage point might have been, and why they did that so excellently.
Mike: Yeah, because imagine if they’d said, “Well, I can’t believe you’re asking us for help.” You might be turned off. Or if a college student wanted to come ask you for help, and you’re like, “Come on, son, pull your bootstraps up. Figure it out.” But it’s helped me to go, okay, I can ask for help, because I need help in this area of my life, and I think person X can help me. Just like you said, I would relish the opportunity to help someone else if they would come ask. So then it makes me think that when we don’t ask for help, we’re robbing all of us of the chance to serve one another. We’re all holding it in all the time.
Chris: We are. And I think you hit on something really good there too: we are gifted in different ways. I believe you said this here on the podcast before: not everybody’s the arm, not everybody’s the head, not everybody’s the leg. All these things work together and are interdependent on each other. And so, you’re right, if we’re not asking, then in some ways we’re keeping people from actually exercising their gifts in our life, which maybe God designed the whole time: that we’re supposed to ask, and let that build community between each other, and friendship, and all those good things that come from serving each other.
Mike: I have a hard time reading the Bible and not walking away with the emphasis on community, which we’ve talked about, and being able to spur each other on to love and good works, to help each other. When you play this out and you don’t ask for help, for whatever reason, which I’m going to say is probably a prideful reason, but regardless of your reason, when you don’t ask, the whole system breaks down. If you don’t ask, the person can’t help you. Then the next person is not going to ask, and vice versa. But imagine the flip side. We’re all actually asking each other in an earnest way, and we’re all able to help each other. Then you see the different members of the body working together and showing up, and we’re getting to serve and humble ourselves. It makes me think we’re risking a lot when we don’t ask for help. It seems dangerous. This goes much beyond our own pride or our own struggle on whatever the topic is. For example, my car breaks down and I don’t want to ask our friend to help me. I might be doing a lot of damage by holding all this in and not expressing my request, or asking to begin with. It’s a big deal.
Chris: It is. And I’m not saying it’s easy. We know it’s not easy. And I think the more personal the situation is, the harder it gets to ask for help. We’re talking about cars, we’re talking about taking on a corporate job you’re not familiar with. But when it comes to health, or marriage, or anything else in our life, there might be some embarrassment about not having the situation under control, and it might be harder to share with people.
Mike: No, I’m with you, because it is. That’s where it’s going to feel vulnerable, because it is personal, and we’re not invalidating that. But here’s the rub. When we’re honest and we actually ask for help, you learn from the next person: oh, you struggle in the same vein. We talked about some lessons learned on another episode about being a husband and effective communication. Chances are any husband could listen to that and go, oh, I also struggle with that. And then you go, okay, it’s not just me. It helps level the playing field. Man, it’s such a hard topic, because I get it. It’s scary. It feels vulnerable. You feel like a failure if you ask. But the reality is, you are not a failure by asking for help. You’re a real human being, and all seven billion human beings on the planet need help with something, period, no matter what.
Chris: I believe we’ve already gotten to the point where we’re like, okay, it’s okay to ask for help. On the opposite end of the spectrum, there’s also the guy eating Cheetos who just wants everybody to help him. Or girl.
Mike: This is the puffy Cheetos person.
Chris: I’m not saying, and you’re not saying either, that you don’t try to learn things and try to do them with excellence. There’s certainly room for growing, and there’s nothing that stops us from getting on YouTube and learning how to do something on our vehicle.
Mike: No, of course not. We should always get better. But you’re talking about the person who is expecting the help.
Chris: Expecting the help, maybe even trying to get more than what they actually need help with.
Mike: I mean, there is something to be said about the person who’s expecting or seeking the handout or the help without putting any effort into it. That’s a whole different motivation. Clearly, they don’t have an issue with being vulnerable and asking for help. But that’s taking advantage of other people. And I will say, we’ve probably all come across some of those people in our lifetimes, and it rubs us the wrong way. That could inhibit us from asking for help the next time, because we think the person we’re talking to is going to think of us that way.
Chris: I think that’s a big part of it too, especially when you’ve brought your vehicle over to somebody who’s very good at helping. Part of it is, you don’t want to be seen as that person. You don’t want to be seen as the needy one.
Mike: That’s so challenging, because if you are that person and you’re taking advantage of someone else, you know you’re doing that. So I guess that’s a challenge for all of us to check our motivations and our hearts: why are we asking for help in the first place? The person who’s doing it on purpose to take advantage, you know who you are. But I feel like the majority of people have the other list, all the reasons they don’t want to ask. And I guess my encouragement, as we talk about this, for us to continue to ask for help, and for others, is: don’t be afraid to ask for help. Give someone the opportunity to help you. Put it this way: if someone asks you for help, you’d be glad to help them. So why can’t you ask for it?
Chris: That’s a good sign of maturity in it. I think there should be a tension there in wanting to ask for help, but also the mature step of knowing that it’s bigger than the asking. There’s an opportunity for somebody to serve using their gifts. And then knowing there’s going to be opportunity for you to help others too. There are going to be people who come to you, usually when it’s something they’re just not good at. They might ask you for help, like in the case of helping them with the computer.
Mike: Oh, yeah. A lot of my drive, I would hope, is serving the Lord first and foremost. I can’t always say that’s my first priority or my drive, if I’m going to be honest. But I also think about people who’ve served me so willingly, and they’ve done it in such a way that it stops you. It kind of takes your breath away. And you’re like, wow, that makes me want to turn around and do that for the next person. It’s contagious. It’s like the whole pay-it-forward thing. If you go to Starbucks and the next 15 people are paying for the car behind them, there’s something about that that’s contagious. So imagine when we’re asking for help and we’re all willingly serving one another. It would probably be easier for that next person to ask for help, since they’ve been served so well.
Chris: Yeah. And then it just carries on from there, right? Like our good friend, whenever car issues come up that are out of our ability. There’s probably somebody you’re thinking of right now that you might want to reach out to for some help. And it doesn’t have to be car related. It could be just somebody to listen, somebody to talk to. There are a lot of people dealing with loneliness or feeling isolated today, even years after COVID, and mental health has been talked about a lot and has been pretty challenging. It’s easier to be siloed today. You see things happen on social media, but you don’t necessarily have community. So you might be feeling it. But reach out to somebody if they’re on your heart, somebody you’ve been wanting to reach out to and haven’t yet. Take that chance. Open yourself up. Be a little more vulnerable, to have them come on inside and maybe help you through a situation.
Mike: Yeah, that’s a good word, because odds are something has popped into your mind to act on. Don’t chalk that up as coincidence. And hear us say, for ourselves and for you: you are no less valuable by asking for help. In fact, you’re valuing the person you’re asking, because they have value and you have value. First John 4:19 says we love because He first loved us. So we love because Jesus has reached out to us and initiated. And so therefore we can easily reach out to the next person.
Chris: And we certainly couldn’t do that on our own, could we?
Mike: No, not at all. And if we can’t do that on our own, there are going to be so many things here we can’t do on our own. So don’t be afraid of that. In fact, embrace it, and embrace the fact that you’re giving someone an opportunity to serve you. Try it. And not just chances are, you’ll find relief and comfort in them helping you, and you’ll turn right around and help the next person.
Chris: Yeah. Could you take a look at my computer for me?
Mike: Only if you look at my car.
Chris: I have car issues. You won’t get any help from me.
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